these used to be my pants

These used to be my pants:


**please note, we were playing and Oslo likes to chew through material so this was not dog abuse.

Yes, these used to be my pants. The pants I bought in high school (13 years ago). The pants I would wear to cover my little white legs before volleyball games while in high school. The pants that almost look like a skirt because the legs are super duper uber wide. The pants that were like a security blanket and were my favorite to where when I wanted extra comfort. The pants that when my significant other first saw them he thought to himself, “Whoa, this is a side to Ali I was not aware of. I’m not so sure about this.” The pants that my significant other said I should retire because they looked ridiculous on me (were so worn out they didn’t stay up, holes in spots where holes should not be, etc). The pants I did retire once as suggested by my significant other but then brought back out before walking the dog. The pants that made my significant other think even more so “Whoa. Scary. Those had been retired.” The pants than are now a dog chew toy.

Author: Ali Carras

At a very young age I lost site of my mom in a local grocery store in Boulder, Colorado. I did, however, have the smarts to go to the customer service counter. The kind woman at the counter asked "What is your name little girl?" My reply: "Assi." The woman gave me a look like, "Are you playing with me you little devil?" but she proceeded to blast on the loudspeaker the "We have a lost Assi at the front of the store." Customers throughout the store gagged and giggled, but my mom knew exactly who the woman was referring to: the mullet haired little girl with a tongue too big for her mouth, wearing a leotard, skirt, tights, and jelly shoes (with florescent green laces in them...even though they didn't need the laces). A shy little character for whom every little detail in life was a huge thing. I am pleased to report that today I am able to fully pronounce Allison (aka Ali), but the Assi pseudonym has always stuck, evolving into Aszi. As for the shy little character for whom every little detail in life was a huge thing? Some things never change. I have closed my comments due to mass amounts of spam that no filter could ever control. Feel free to contact me abeckord [at] gmail.com!

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